The bedspread that my deep soul friend sowed for me before I got on that airplane is lying across the bed. Small scissors are lying on it. A cut is in it and scraps from the quilt are lying on the floor. My heart sank. “Ok, girls, please honestly tell mommy who cut my special quilt.” One responded with confusion, obviously unaware. The other with high drama and expressive questioning…convincing. The third said, “Mommy, I didn’t do it, I promise.” Something she always says, even when she’s lying. All girls to their beds.
I felt defeated again, for the third time since Dave left 2 days ago, I have another huge character, heart issue to uncover, address, discipline and disciple. ‘Lord, give me wisdom…help me see…’ I silently prayed…‘Holy Spirit shed light on the deception…’
The past two days had been filled with long conversations addressing heart issues, selfishness, lying, disobedience, lack of respect for authority…In my mind I KNOW they are kids…I know I sin just as much, but it’s felt overwhelming and like we are sliding backwards in our training. I feel like I give my heart and soul to my kids…but do I give it all to Jesus first? I felt like I could cry. Three little girls, eyes-wide…looking at me with sincerity, but one was lying. “We can sit here until we find the truth….we can stay here all morning.” Suddenly I looked at her eyes. Everyone was blaming the one who has been more prone to disobedience and lying as of late. Actually all were convinced she did it, except me. I looked to the one who had done it and I said simply, “You aren’t telling me the truth are you?” Her eyes welled with tears and she was silent. She did it. Lied to cover it. Was allowing her siblings to blame her sister…and she was protecting herself. Oh, so sad. I left the room admitting I didn’t exactly know how to handle it.
Downstairs with the other three, we began talking about how to restore this. They all shared how that felt to be deceived and to be blamed, and to really believe their sister, but find out she was lying. One even said, “That really, really hurt my heart…I believed her.” Caleb ended up apologizing to the one he was blaming. We talked about deceit, the Father of Lies, shifting blame, not accepting responsibility for our sins…and how Jesus already paid the price. We reminded ourselves that we’ve all sinned this week, and even lied.
We went back upstairs to show mercy and restore this one…she just stared as the others shared their hurts and how they felt. We talked about humility and confessing our sins. We talked about how Jesus already died to take away our sins, so we don’t ever need to shift blame to someone we love. Confession finally came…oh it’s so painful. She apologized to all…forgiveness came.
I felt like I was in the midst of a huge moment of redemption in a little family on this great big earth. Amazing to watch and experience the Gospel come down into a little girls’ heart in her bedroom in the middle of Soddo, Ethiopia. He is the Father of Truth, of Mercy…and of Redemption.
Lord, give us the wisdom and the heart to keep pressing into your heart for the sake of our kids…for the sake of the Gospel in their lives…give us the delight in being part of these redemption moments so we keep on and keep on. All for you, Jesus. All for you IN us, all for you IN our children and in our own hearts…all so we can see your KINGDOM…on earth as it is in Heaven. Thank you for your encouragement in our all our weaknesses…to keep looking to you, to keep speaking truth and forgiveness and undeserved grace to our childrens’ hearts and to our own…help us to keep walking closer to You.